Abandoned by God? - The Role Parents Play in Spiritual Development

All of us at some point in our life feel the pain ofIf we are to understand our own unique relationship
abandonment. We came into this world needy andwith God (or whatever word feels appropriate) we
helpless, unable to feed or clean ourselves, emotingmay feel that the Left Hand version is much more
to get these basic needs met through our parents orour cup of tea. The conservative,
guardians. For some abandonment is clearly feltall-fear-the-wrath-of-God system has seeped into our
through the lens of divorce, death or neglect. Others,culture and society as a whole.
even under the best circumstances of being nurtured,To turn the tide and create a new conscious
will at some point along the way become disillusionedunderstanding of our individual relationship to our
by the fact that our parents will die as will we.spirituality is necessary. It is at the core of
Viewing Our Parents as Godtranscending the negative connotations of God
Regardless of how we are raised when we are littlehaving to be one specific way, or of being left for
we view our parents as God, even if this is far fromdead if you question or disagree with a particular
true. They are perfect beings that seem to performsystem of belief.
magical acts continually. Our parents take on the rolesReturning to Childhood...
of best friend, confidant, protector, hero or that ofWe enter this world with our essence in totality.
an indestructible force. "My Dad can lift two cars byNothing is left behind. Our soul's work is within us and
himself!" "My Mommy can fly!"our work is to discover what that work consists of
Our exaggerations are living truth at this stage ofwhile making many mistakes along the way.
development. The parental figure is powerful, strong,Regardless of our upbringing that essence does not
vital and literally much bigger than us. We look up toleave us or cease to exist. We simply need ways to
our parents as the measure of how to behave andremember what it is.
function in the world.Reclaiming The Soul
So when we first become aware of anyThere may be pieces of our soul that get lost,
disappointment we are having with our caregivers ittrapped in moments of trauma or difficulty from the
also transfers over to our view of God or Source. Ifpast but we can retrieve them. That is the purpose
we grow up with the understanding that we shouldof a soul retrieval, an internal journey to call back to
be fearful of our parents, we fear the idea of Godus the aspects that feel lost or abandoned.
as well. The disappointment we feel becomesWhen we are young, we are not capable of being
internalized and we set out to alleviate ourselves ofable to work with the extremity of certain situations.
that pain; that fear of abandonment. WhateverWe get overwhelmed and dissociate, a piece of who
survival tactic we have used that seems to workwe are may leave to protect us from the damage.
(whether or not that has negative implications) weOur body and soul are incredibly intelligent and our
stick to.always working on our behalf even if it means
Religion Instills This View of God Deeper"checking out" in order to prevent us from
If our parents recognize that we will grapple with thisexperiencing the full brunt of the pain.
feeling of abandonment they will help us toBeing Ready to Re-Parent Ourselves
understand the deeper aspects of who we are. OurWhen we are ready (and I want to emphasize
autonomy and individuality will be celebrated andready) we can then find the objective conditions to
nurtured. This, however, is not always the case.call these pieces of ourselves back, reclaiming them.
Many (not all) organized religious systems are basedWe re-parent these childhood injuries, nurturing and
in shame and guilt where a judgmental God watchesbefriending these hurts back to health. We can then
our every move and for whom we must consistentlystart to understand our abandonment issues from a
ask forgiveness for our "sins".subjective and objective place while also
In Michael Lerner's book, The Left Hand of God, heunapologetically restructuring our relationship to the
repeatedly demonstrates the difference between theDivine.
judgmental, wrathful and punishing God (The RightWhat's Next?
Hand) that is the foundation of the conservativeYou can read more articles here more articles here
movement against the kind, compassionate andfor perspectives on Energy Psychology, EFT and
empathetic God (The Left Hand) that gets lost in theholistic healing.
shadows (especially in times of war).